I am writing the song Solaris. I love it. it is smooth, cool, mysterious, sexy sounding. it is about Juliet. Inspired by her in some way. as if it was she in that film. Floating out there in space. Something like this. Reconnecting only to find that you will need to reconnect again in another lifetime. This is the theme. I have known Juliet before. in other lifetimes. I see it in her eyes. I don't know what it is or what its supposed to be. I don't think its that important to know as much as just to honor what I do feel. Its those eyes. since the first moment I saw her eyes I felt as if she was looking at me, time stops and she is talking to me with those eyes. I will never tell her that. I ask myself, “what is it?” so I write a few songs about it and move on. The new songs for the new new new album are just beginning to become solidified between the four of us. Vancouver hasn’t been a part of the new songs yet. the album seems to have a very cinematic quality to it. thinking of calling it either revolution in me or cinematique. It is as if I am composing a film with this one.

Manager called today. if the diaries were not over we could give him a name, but there is no need now. Anthony from universal called to say they are passing because he “doesn’t hear any hits” on sleep with you. What an idiot. No hits. Like Veronica is not a hit. What are you going to do but laugh? “No hooks,” he says. I was screaming, jumping up and down. Throwing the football against the wall. Loud thuds. You know, say what you fucking will about transcendence. we've been turned down for every reason in the book by these guys over the last few years. Say you don't like Fishy’s vocals. Or Infinito’s drumming is too Latin or experimental, or say that the overt sexuality on sleep with you bothers you... but don't fucking say you don't hear any hooks on a fucking Fishy album. Our manager says, ‘”Fishy honestly I didn't know what to say in response to the guy. What do you say to that? You guys write hooks better than almost any band I know of right now. Shit, I think that's your best quality, is the song writing. and the guitar. That's why we signed you. He could have just said that he didn't think that y’alls material was modern enough. At least then I would have hung up that phone with a little bit of respect for the guy. But he seriously sat there and told me that he didn't hear any hooks in your songs. I'm sorry pal. I don't know what to tell you. The guy is an idiot. Don’t worry about it. We’ll keep moving on. In the meantime, keep getting yourselves ready for these tours. And I'll keep you posted.” “roger that.”

Publicist calls a few hours later (gonna need to come up with a name for her...) (by the way I am starting to develop a serious crush on her—she is one vibrant babe. I guess that's why she gets paid the big bucks for publicizing people, because of her personality.) “Your manager called and told me what that idiot at Universal said. I'm sorry.” “Don't be. We don't want to get picked up by a bigger label on this one unless they fucking worship us. Fuck that. it wouldn’t work. I'm not even worried about it. We’ll stay on the smaller label who still has ears.” “But no hooks? He said he didn't hear any hooks? That’s retarded.” “Tell me about it. When rise and shine came out they told us it was too eclectic, too diverse. And now we get more fan mail about that album than we ever have... you would think it was the fucking Holy Grail or something.” “Its awesome Fishy.” “Well thanks. I like it too.” “Oh you do, do you?” she laughs. “Yeah, you know, I can still objectify... I hear it. Now that we’re getting all this attention for it two years later. it helps me appreciate it too now... you know?” “I'm glad.” “For a while there I wasn't hearing it. I was too busy listening to these guys at the large labels and their insistence that we make something more straight ahead...” “How do you deal with that?” “With what?” “You guys know you have amazing product. it isn't like you have to believe in yourself or anything cheesy like that. You guys know you have great product. You don't have to talk yourselves into it or anything. How do you deal with all this bullshit?” “I don't know. We just do. I've never known anything different. So I just keep doing what I do, you know?” “Well you're a tough cookie.” “Yeah I guess. Or I'm just really stupid. LOL.”

Somewhere between Fishy and Tobias Guess now. Floating between the two. Who am I now? I am me. I am starting to believe in me. It is a powerful feeling.