A few things I've observed. when you are in love, it is all you think about. another thing. when you fall in love with someone you experience something called jealousy. I had forgotten about jealousy. But it is real. As unenlightened and untranscendent as it may be, its like a ghost that creeps up on you when you're sleeping, and its hard to shake off.

Current read: Persepolis, by Marjane Satrapi ... this book is cool because it is in the form of one giant comic book, about a hundred and fifty page history of modern Iran. So its not so scholarly. Just a good read of the facts with an attempt to be very light-hearted and whimsical... which lightens the otherwise tragic events being relayed. I am inspired from the learning, but horrified at what I have learned. Lots of data to process.

Quickly:
- the Iranians are not Arabs, like many of the other middle eastern countries. They are Persians, or Aryans. The name Iran comes from the word Aryan. The Arabs/Muslims invaded in 636 and forced their Muslim religion onto them – they were Zoroastrians before that – which as we've already discussed is very similar to Judaism/Christianity.
- since that time they had always been ruled by one monarchy or dynasty or another. But the people wanted to rule, they wanted a democracy. In the 1930s it looked as though the people were going to have a revolution and take over the country from the then-emperor, and turn it into a republic or democracy so the people could rule. Just like the United States.
- But England and the United States came in and bribed the revolutionaries into keeping it a monarchy instead of a democracy because they wanted the oil. So they promised their support of the revolution and lots of money in exchange for free access and first rights to all of this oil they were finding. So they basically turned the government from one monarchy into another overnight, but one they could control. The people didn't get to rule themselves after all. instead they were now being ruled by England and America thinly veiled as being through this new monarchy, the Shaw.
- this went on for fifty years and the dictatorship was pretty brutal. The American CIA helped teach the Iranian government spy and torture techniques in order to capture and torture and kill anyone who was trying to win the country back for the people so they could become a democracy like we are. they were just trying to be like us, but our government was working to stop them from doing that because they were controlling the dictatorship/monarchy that was in charge so they could get the oil. crazy stuff.
- in 1979 the people finally took over in the great revolution and overthrew the shaw. But they did it through this whole Islamic thing....using religious fervor and fundamentalism to empower them to do so.... so bye bye shaw but hello crazy Muslims.
- soon after the take over they took the Americans hostage as a way to get back at us for how we killed and tortured so many of them for so long. growing up in America we aren't told any of this of course. we are taught that they took us hostage because they are crazy fuckers. They forget to mention that our government was lying to the whole world and killing and torturing them and keeping their people in a dictatorship for fifty years even though they wanted their own democracy. So of course they were mad and they took a bunch of people hostage. I remember seeing the American flags burning on TV as a tiny boy and thinking ‘gosh how scary. Who would want to do that to us?’ I understand now. they weren't doing it to ‘us’ but they were doing it to our government. Our uncontrolled crazy ass government that does whatever it wants to in our name and then we the people pay the price for it.
- o.k. so then Saddam Hussein of Iraq decides to invade Iran in 1980 because they have permission from the United States. not only do they have permission, the American government is offering money and weapons and anything else Saddam wants in order to get him to take over the country of Iran. One assumes the US government’s plan was to get Iraq to take over Iran and then to take over Iraq and we would have both countries under our belt. So for eight years the US gov secretly supported the Iraqis against the Iranians... out of the frying pan and into the fire these US government guys are. from one mess to another.


one thing is this. Iran is Iran. Its not America. In a way none of this has to be my business. So with that said, suffice it to say that Iran will be Iran and we will be America. But as an American at heart, the aspects that involve America are the aspects of the story that still touch me the deepest. I cannot help but be affected by the history of Iran as we, our government, directly relate to these people’s lives and futures....

So where are we with this? I mean, as an American... as a person.... as a human... its 7am. I sit here in the dark and type in the dead quiet. For some reason I wake up super early now... no matter how late I go to bed... this can only be a good thing. I'm listening to this amazing Persian classical music right now as I type, the music is fast and pulsing, the vocals haunting and ancient sounding; my thoughts are fast... just need to get it down...

obviously I feel lied to. have to let that go. we have to face it and let it go. we are being lied to. it was all a lie. The Iranians taking our people hostage because they are crazy and evil... that was a lie. It was we who were being crazy and evil and they were reacting to that after fifty years under the persecution and control of the US and England tyrannical clutches... so we were lied to and we are still being lied to. o.k. but we have no choice in this. we’re not going to be taking over our government anytime soon. they have shown that to us time and time again. the days of the people of America controlling America are over. they lie to us. we have to face it, accept it. they are lying murdering thieving fuckhead bastards, as most governments of the earth seem to be, -- in their defense I will offer that maybe they aren't aware of it because I believe their webs of deception are so twisted and interwoven at this point that most of them don't even know what the hell is going on.

[I mean think of guys like Fred grandy (gopher from love boat) or sonny bono or even shirley temple who were all congresspersons for so long. do you think that they knew that we were the bad guys and that Iran was the good guys? I mean did they/do they know how fucked up and lied to we were? Or do they just wake up everyday in the matrix and head to the office not even knowing any of this.... I guess that's one we’ll never know. at least not now. and again, the other question that arises is if they did know, were they doing anything about it? I mean, for every person who works in American government who does know about all these different lies and deceptions and misdeeds, are they doing anything about any of it or are they just happy to collect a paycheck?]

O.k. so we now know that much of what we Americans are seeing and hearing on our TVs is a lie just like what we are told the other countries of the world experience. Only, in our instance it isn't necessarily our media who is lying to us; it’s our government who is consistently lying to our media. We have a smart media here. both above ground and underground. the best. so eventually they find out about the lies and deceptions – as in Watergate or in Iran-contra-gate, -- read summary of that here: http://encarta.msn.com/encyclopedia_761573296/Iran-Contra_Affair.html   ... It actually makes no sense that during the same war with the same two countries the US government was funding and supplying weapons to one country and selling other weapons to the other country at the same time... talk about mixed signals... I think their real message might have been something like ‘would you both get on with the killing and total annihilation of both of your countries so we can move in and get the oil.... ‘o.k. look here you take these weapons and then to the other side, here you take these weapons...’ crazy stuff... so then when our government gets caught, as you will read about in the above article everyone just says stuff like ‘oh well that happened a long time ago and none of us had anything to do with it and we’re really sorry etc...’ and life goes on as always... and you won't believe it but then a few years later the next president of the United States pardons everyone involved in the whole affair as George bush senior did to everyone in the Iran contra  affair. Here, just read the whole thing here: it takes two minutes:

Iran-Contra Affair, American political scandal of 1985 and 1986, in which high-ranking members in the administration of President Ronald Reagan arranged for the secret sales of arms to Iran in direct violation of existing United States laws. Profits from the $30 million in arms sales were channeled to the Nicaraguan right-wing “contra” guerrillas to supply arms for use against the leftist Sandinista government. This, too, was in direct violation of U.S. policy. The chief negotiator of these deals was Lieutenant Colonel Oliver North, a military aide to the National Security Council. North reported his activities initially to National Security Adviser Robert C. McFarlane, the council's head, and subsequently to his successor, Vice Admiral John M. Poindexter. The sale of arms to Iran was initiated at the suggestion of the Israeli government with the dual goal of bettering relations with Iran and of obtaining the release of American hostages held in Lebanon by pro-Iranian terrorists. North was instrumental in setting up a covert network for providing support to the contras, with its own ship, airplanes, airfield, and secret bank accounts.
In November 1986 a Lebanese magazine disclosed that the United States government had negotiated an arms deal with Iran. Later that month Attorney General Edwin Meese verified that millions of dollars from these sales had been sent to the contras in direct violation of the Boland Amendment, which Congress had passed in 1984 and which prohibited direct or indirect U.S. military aid to them. As new details of the widening scandal emerged, a series of congressional and legal investigations began. In February 1987 the Tower Commission, a special panel headed by former U.S. Senator John Tower of Texas, issued a report castigating President Reagan and his advisers for their lack of control over the National Security Council. The Congressional Joint Investigative Committee collected more than 300,000 documents, conducted more than 500 interviews and depositions, and listened to 28 witnesses in 40 days of public hearings. In November 1987 the committee reported that the president bore the ultimate responsibility for the implementation of his administration's policies but found no firm evidence that he had known of the diversion of funds to the contras. In May 1989 North was tried and convicted of obstructing Congress and unlawfully destroying government documents, but his conviction was subsequently overturned. A guilty decision on Poindexter's actions was also later reversed. The scandal's reverberations concerning the ultimate responsibility for the operation continued into the 1990s. In December 1992 President George Bush, who had been vice president under Reagan and who had also been implicated, but not charged, in the scandal, issued pardons to many of the top government officials who had been charged or convicted for their role in the Iran-Contra affair. Independent prosecutor Lawrence E. Walsh published his final report on the investigation of the affair in January 1994. Walsh concluded that there was no evidence that Reagan had broken the law, but he noted that Reagan may have participated in, or known about, a cover-up.


O.k. so now we know, unless you can’t read or have difficulty with reading comprehension – and if that's the case what the hell are you doing in here? – now we know that the US government is no different than all of the other lying thieving manipulating murdering cover-it-up bastards that we read about in the newspapers everyday...

o.k. so still, where does that put us? as thinking breathing living caring trying-to-be-honest humans... where does this realization that the American government very well might be the thieving lying murdering red horned big bully of the modern world and we the people are just too stupid to realize it take us as people? scared? Yeah, sure we’re scared. This is scary stuff. my friends tell me ‘dude don't even talk to me about this stuff. I don't want to know. and why you write about it I will never know. aren't you worried? You think if they don't have any problem killing over a hundred thousand Iraqi people that they are going to have a problem killing you? you're insane to even be going there. you should forget about all of this...’ so this is the common feeling among most people in most countries around the world. do not rebel, do not resist, do not speak out, just mind your business.. I know. I feel that way most of the time. after all, it isn't my business if America wants to kill people in Iraq or torture people in Iran. How does that affect me?

well... that leads us where it leads us doesn’t it... after all, what is most important is making enough money to live and support your family and try to dig on some love and music and art now and then... I know that... but something in me calls to me... as a human and as a deeply patriotic and passionate American...

So how can we as enlightened beings help the people in elected government become more enlightened? That I believe may be the real question here... what can we do as a people to really love and appreciate these men and yet at the same calmly and politely and smoothly get them to leave office before they continue to do any more damage... or to straighten up and fly right?

Will it ever be possible?

you know when I was hanging with the anti-free-trade activists last year I had made a comment about bono and what a big influence he was on me... his social activism... but Red had told me that his intentions were good but that he was lost and had fallen into the wrong hands.... I didn't understand that then. but I do now. it took me a year to get it. instead of really speaking out against the real evil in American government, he is cowering to it in order to seek his own agenda, and his agenda is certainly a noble one, but he is doing it at the expense of speaking the truth about the people he is conspiring with. Hiding the enemy because there is something to be gained from the enemy...

not easy to believe about our blessed bono I know because after all he is the closest thing to Jesus Christ we have had in two thousand years.. but still...

Is there anything we can do? I mean, we are all pretty much hiding the enemy at this point. The enemies are right in our own white house and capital building I guess. What can we really do about it? how can we evolutionize this great country that has so much potential? I do not believe in revolution anymore. At least not for America. We do not need to completely revolutionize our government. We are damn close already to being what we are promised to become one day. but we do need to evolve. We do need to demand that our government once for all tells the truth now and then...

Does this mean that the current Iranian Islamic fundamentalist government is a good group of fellows? No, probably not. does this mean that they would welcome you or me with open arms and not chop our heads off? No probably not. I'm not presuming innocence on anyone's part. The truth is that current rule in Iran sucks for most Iranians that are smart enough to be able to tell. And yes they are still longing for a real democracy as they have for thousands of years. but that doesn’t mean that America should step in and take over their country either... but wouldn’t it be great if they really tried to help in an honest manner without a hidden agenda?

So what could we do if we were an honest country with an honest government with good intentions? How can we help rather than continue to harm? And what can average everyday citizens like you and me do to help bring this about? that's the question... I for one don’t have a clue. I like most people are scared shitless of the American government at this point. The more I read and learn and study the more frightened I become.

current spin: Alizadeh, Shajarians, Kalhor: without you. Persian classical. You feel it in your soul, deep inside it goes.

Yo Fishy,
I heard that CBGB's is closing, as reported in the Village Voice.  Have you heard about this? 
CBGB closes.
The Hit Factory and Cello Studios close.
Grammy's lowest viewership in a decade.
Commercial radio consolidation creating death spiral for radio.
Better save some buckshot in that gun for me as well.
Zeke