Yet another hurricane is hitting South Florida. Reminds you of all those Nostradamus/Edgar Cayce/bible predictions about the end of the world.. that's four hurricanes this year. but as I was walking through tropical storm force winds today barely able to stand up, I was thinking about the whole end of the world scenario that the various religions love to look forward to, and honestly I don't see it happening. Supposedly, the whole southern tip of Florida is supposed to go back under the water, more than half of California is supposed to be destroyed by earthquakes (o.k., that one is plausible), and the island of New York is supposed to get destroyed and go back under water... About Florida though, I'm thinking about it, and even if we have twenty hurricanes in a row, Florida is not going under water from hurricanes. Maybe from severe tidal waves for days at a time or something... but not hurricanes. California on the other hand, well, I wouldn’t live on an earthquake fault line if you paid me to live there, let alone the other way around. That's just asking for trouble. They could go under any day and not even be warned about it. just one day, bam! Earthquake. Not for me. so I think Florida is safe. But I guess we will just have to wait and see. You can certainly get yourself in quite an uproar if you start paying too much attention to all these end of the world predictions. I used to be obsessed with it, but I just decided that it wasn't being much of service to myself or anyone by paying attention to it. when it comes to hurricanes, we are lucky in the fact that we have plenty of warning with them, unlike tornadoes or earthquakes. We just can’t totally predict where they are going to strike, and we can’t get them to go away. Opus and I were amazed when thinking about it how there's no number or anything that we can just call up and say ‘hey we love your whole hurricane idea and all, but its been a bit much lately. How much to make it go away? Like all Americans I am confounded whenever I discover that I cannot buy my way out of something. unfortunately natural disasters are one of the few things that fall into that category. Here is basic info about hurricanes and what the hell they are. http://www.local10.com/weather/3757281/detail.html#

Date, what date?

Dear Jules,

Yesterday I wrote the below, and rambled some reply... in response to your email. got busy, never sent it, then decided not to because its just me rambling. But I will use it for something. post it to the diaries... at least I can use it for the diaries, the great American online novel experiment... I hope you don't mind I steal our lives for my life’s work. All part of the great work the psychic told me about years ago. God that was fifteen years ago he told me about me becoming famous for these things... me rambling about my life he said... he told me it would be my life fictionalized or perhaps fiction that was portending to be my life... he couldn’t quite get his words around what he was seeing but said he was sure about it and it would come when it was ready... and that I would know when it happened... at the time I had no idea what he was talking about and thought he was clueless. I just wanted to be a singer at the time. Little did I know... 

See Below for some interim chatter: wish us luck here, another hurricane is headed our way... and me homeless at the moment down here. I have an apt in New York already but unable to get there due to my office being here and having to be so busy working for all the band niz right now.... and trying to figure out how to get all my stuff to the city. so I'm here just living out of a suitcase. Strength you said. Yes strength has been the major calling card as of late.

Keep up the reiki. Till I get moved in up there. you are one hell of a beautiful person and I appreciate the positive vibage floating my way. and if my being a guinea pig is helping in any way, then great. Feel free to check back for objective feedback.

See below for more:

-----Original Message-----
From: Juliet [mailto:juliet@XXX.org] 
Sent: Thursday, September 23, 2004 12:50 PM
To: fishy@transcendence.com
Subject: titleless

Fishy, you are Christmas, Halloween, hydrotherapy and bungee jumping all in one shot.

***o.k. not sure what that means but as always it is one hell of a sentence..... Juliet you are a master wordsmith. I swear to god you make me laugh out loud. o.k. no I get it. I'm a gift, scary, cleansing, and exciting all in one shot... yes of course. Sorry. Not quite fully awake (he says at 2:10PM) HAHA.

glad to be included among the Julies-- stellar company, it's true, esp. Julianne moore--brilliant.

****I love julia Roberts personality. It’s so light and happy and witty. Julianne Moore --- making love with her would be wonderful. Watching her have an orgasm... She seems very passionate. she's more like the great mystery woman. hidden treasures in her soul... I would love to have dinner with her. watch her eat. see how she holds her silver... marvel at how she drinks from her glass...
 
Good thing my inner beauty shines forth. but you should realize that lack of razor or depilatory mechanism doth not a sasquatch make. my choice of barbaric practices just happens not to include them. Your picture of us must be hideous!!

*****just keep these sentences coming!!! Lololol. You are classic!!!! My picture of you all is not hideous --- kind of like the Beverly hillbillies meets a few scraggly deadheads.... HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

*****its just totally different. Look, I spend hours at the salon each month getting depilatated, waxed, brushed, cut, dyed, massaged, polished, buffed, and sprayed etc.... but that doesn’t mean that I wasn't once a hippy myself, for you well know that I once was. 

so I dig your scene. No problem. no judgment. In fact I am sure I am still living it that way in an alternate reality...

****If you want my honest opinion, I just find it very funny/peculiar that I have all of these dreams about a girl who is one, almost married to another guy, and two, is so hippiesh rather than all dolled up like I think I like/want/need. but I will tell you this very whiskey-straight-up (holy shit I'm starting to talk like you now): this dream I had last night and the other nights in the last few weeks/now its been months... how do I put this... in the dreams... and I am not presuming this to be our reality at all, but just some other world, alternate universe, that exists perhaps nowhere else but in my mind, you are like my soul mate, of some kind... in these dreams... like when I look at you, when I am looking at you and talking to you in these dreams, and what has there been now? maybe ten of them in six months... when we are speaking I am speaking to a soul-mate or a lifetime-equal-someone who I love so much that as I write this I have to stop myself from crying... because the connection is so pure and strong and I cannot quite figure it out. When you were swimming last night you were like my sister, or my wife, or just a good friend... it was already there, already had manifested, and we were just there together smiling and laughing and deeply talking while you floated around in the water with that sparkle in your eye... and we were taking it for granted... and I was of course standing there on the water like it was no big deal... this was glorious if not just a nice vision. and you know how dreams are. They seem so real...

now, we spoke about being boyfriend and girlfriend in the dream, (remember this is just my dream, and what is a dream? The person’s mind just trying to work stuff out.... I have always just assumed.... so take it light) in the water, but before I could get a handle on what was being discussed or decided, you ducked under the water and started swimming across the pool... so I don't know what was decided or discussed...

and there is more, and I don't write this to be disrespectful to you or your man or to my future girlfriend/mate or whatever, I'm just exploring here to let it all loose from my consciousness... there was a dream about two weeks ago where we did try to fool around. I told you about the dream but never mentioned that we tried to fool around because, you know, respect for your man and you, but yes we tried to fool around, but from what I remember it didn't work out too well....

need to get to work here. but yes, it was very brief and from what I can remember it wasn't about that; it wasn't about us fooling around; the idea I have is that it is not about that, about us fooling around, but about perhaps some kind of series of lifetimes connection that is friendly in nature, and again, my mind creates you appearing in the dreams as a smiling friendly connected understanding happy content wise companion because after all that is what you can be in real life and perhaps more than anything that is simply what I need right now in dream states to help waking life due to so much craziness...

pause...................................

this reminds me of this one time this guy came to our house and proposed to Madelynne... my girlfriend at the time. Remember her? this is true. he really did. it was crazy. made no sense. His attraction was real of course, to him, but all in his mind. It wasn't reciprocated... He fell in love with my girlfriend. It was crazy. and because I was so open minded and liberal, I just let him in the house and went upstairs and let them take care of business, let him propose and all and waited upstairs to see what happened... that's what we hippies do...

well I don't want to give the wrong impression here that that is where we are because we are not. Especially not when you say you don't wear bras and don't shave and stuff... oh man that would be a Stretch for me... in all honesty... LOLOLOL!!! I'd be like ‘Juliet lets go to the opera,,,,, can you PLEASE shave??? Just this once????’ LOLOLOLOL. O.k. I'm rambling here. but I'm rambling for a reason. We’re getting somewhere. I'm either trying to talk myself out of this or into it. I'm just saying, that as someone who is probably too often TOO concerned with being a gentlemen that I feel very uncomfortable and out of place writing any of this to you ... something not right about it. I certainly wouldn’t want someone writing it to my girlfriend/wife/lifemate.... but I allow myself the expulsion of these ideas in order to let it out so I can get some clarity on what this is.... dreaming of you every few nights for months now. seeing your name pop up everywhere around me.

I have to say from what I can tell I don't have any attraction to Juliet, ---- though I think I am still in love with the Juliet that I saw at the cookie counter for thirty seconds at the mall fifteen years ago. Why I don't know. something in the eyes. could never get over it. that look. Time stood still for me. my heart beat faster. it didn't for her. it should have. it must for both, right? so it must have just been me. must have just been something I saw or wanted to see, but never lead anywhere. And will most likely not lead anywhere... I don't even know her now. although from what I do know of her now, I find her closer to SHE than anyone I have ever read... the way she speaks. How wise she is, how pure, how loving and kind.... but there is... well obvious obstacles, and I'm not even talking about the fact that she lives three thousand miles away or that she is bascailly married to another guy... etc. I'm talking about just me and who I think I am what I want out of life. so there has to be something totally different here that I am just not seeing. If she were a man I would not be questioning this at all. yes that's it. I would just be taking the ride and enjoying the connection to another...

I certainly don't have an attraction to a girl who doesn’t dress up or get all dolled up and want to look gorgeous so we can go out together and paint the town, because that's what I love about life so much, so this is not happening... but I will say this, and may God hear me, if I get one more sign from the universe that says Juliet, or one more sign that says bend, Oregon or says Juliet or anything like that... I am going to take out my .357 magnum and start firing it into the sky and shoot God right out of heaven because this is driving me crazy. well perhaps I will purposely miss him... but still fire at will... for I cannot get a handle on this creation and what it is trying to tell me... who is Juliet and what is she in my life?

no wait... I am calm... why can’t I just allow it? allow it to be? perhaps I am just too eager, too ambitious... too hungry to always be making things happen... I can allow this... I can allow Juliet to be who she is to me now... whatever that means... why can’t I just enjoy the ride....

I will tell you why. because I want to get married and have children now. that's why. my heart longs for it. my cells long for it. and so do my wife’s. I can feel her wanting it as well.... although she is much more calm than I am. She is much more relaxed about things. not so hyper type A as I am... I want to meet my wife and begin our life together. in fact I don't want to spend another minute without her... and I want us to start having our children so we can meet them too... wow. Bio clock kicking in fierce now... how interesting. when all I thought I really wanted was a harem of fresh girls every few days...

So... that is it then. In all honesty, in my intuition... I feel the knowing. It’s a projection from my mind using the closest thing I have found so far to what my heart longs for...

Juliet says: the dream--thank you for always having me so happy in your dreams. it's like a good wish.     yes, i fully expect you to walk on water, encourage it even. why not? you are shucking all your sense of limitation these days with such good humor and joy, why not that one as well?  the dream had some biblical aspects to it....ever the catholic spasm....remember when Jesus was in the boat with some disciples and he walked on the water and told one of them to come out of the boat and walk too?  and one disciple did, but after a few steps began to lose faith in himself, and lost that power until Jesus said come on man, you can do it-- and the disciple got to hang out in the eye of the storm above the waves with a man most people would still wait in line for lifetimes to meet...yes. so the thing i got from it was, keep your faith in yourself and the Work you are doing strong and healthy-- replace fear with joy and then it won't matter if you are walking on it or swimming in it-- you will still be loved and happy, unjudged.  water is joy and freedom to me, also a medium of communication and cleansing. the ideal would be to be able to walk on water AND swim in it  depending on your mood!  it's the backstage pass phenomenon again.

***thank you. I have had your email open all week and read it for inspiration. Me walking on water and you swimming around with that knowing smile... it’s a cool vision.

Juliet:  the Sikhs have these 1000 day meditations that give you the power to levitate, to walk through walls, to walk on water, etc. it takes 3 years of dedicated practice to do so, and it's guaranteed success--but the catch is, by the time you have completed the meditation, your reasons for wanting that skill are vastly different than the perhaps ego-based reasons initially. your heightened spirit awareness may send you in a completely different direction than anticipated. i always wanted to check that out.  one of these days i will do that with flying. it is alien to me not to be able to do in waking life what i do so easily and exuberantly in dream. cool to see what would come of it. perhaps i would simply turn into a bird at that point. 

****my question is that if people were really levitating and walking through walls and shit we would be hearing about it... wouldn’t we??? And besides, Avatar has taught us that we don't need to work for three years on things like that. we can do it in an instant...

Juliet: whoops gotta get to class-- we are learning Chinese medicine and spa hydrotherapy techniques...i am doing a FOOTSPA for my friends this weekend, not messing with anyone's nails or anything but doing reflexology, massage and soaking----maybe a nice cabernet---(drinking not soaking in it-- i am not Madge for pete's sake.....)
be well Mr. Superstupendous. i will send more reiki if it is suiting you-- such a beautiful feeling, i can't express it without waxing cheezy but the energy itself is so pure and clean, an endless aquifer.

*** I know it well because it sounds like what the Avatar master gives the Avatar student. Pure unadulterated appreciation for their creations... leaves you feeling light and happy and content...

Cheers— Juliet 

Cheers to you dear Juliet