Wednesday, May 28, 2003


A lot of the pain over the last two years since I've been single—the trail of broken hearts as my friends tease me about, its just because you know when people are single, as I've been learning they really are looking for someone, really hoping to find a Mr. or Mrs. Right. And when you meet someone and you have this amazing time with them and everything seems great, but then maybe that person calls it off, it does hurt. And the tendency is to blame that person for hurting you. But deeper than that, its that we just feel so goddamn upset that they don't like us. So we get mad. Its like this what the fuck is wrong with me thing. And you know I never meant to hurt anyone. And I know that no one meant to hurt me. That one time the first girl I dated once me and Cleopatra broke up Kelli, and we went out for a while and then I find out one night she’s seeing her boss out on a date with this guy. And I was surprised you know. I told my boys. Man I'm so hurt I say. And they say get used to it. Welcome to being single bro. You'll bounce back. but I never faulted kell, cause she obviously liked this guy more than me even though we really hit it off. Six months later they were married. So who’s to say? She and I became friends pretty soon after that night. I started giving her tips how to play it with the guy you know. I couldn’t really be mad. I mean who’s to fucking say who someone is going to like. Its just a roll of the dice. Or more than that, its some kind of destiny. You can’t blame someone for not liking you and vice versa. I hate when girls get mad at me for not liking them. and I'm sure they feel the same way about guys, when guys won't stop calling them. I understand their pain, cause I've felt it, but it still hurts when they blame you for something you really can’t help. Cause after I am with a girl I want to keep knowing them and hanging with them anyway. I hate that whole attitude ‘well if we’re not going to go out then I don't care if were friends or not.’ That's a great way to know that you made the right decision when you break up with a girl, if she gives you that line.


Last Movie:  looking for an echo. This was a great movie. I think I'm going to get into doo wop now after seeing this movie.
Current Spin: alanis morrisette, supposed infatuation...

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