Working madly all day and night editing the diaries, now up to 450 pages. The ones from the last two years that we took down. Ready to go up this week. Writing a few new songs. Mostly open D. It’s New Years Eve day and the new years calls and emails are coming in. I am so thankful for my friends. I used to get so weirded out by the friends thing. As we get older we start realizing how precious it is to have friends. If you end up with a handful of friends you can call your brothers or sisters in your lifetime you are very lucky indeed. Talked with Madelynne a long time tonight about this. and about her new baby she is expecting any day now. About how precious our lives are. we went over a few of the people we know who have died already. Car accidents and things like that. life really is so precious. And our connections to people are so special. As I was typing this she called me back to say ‘hey pups just to let you know its been really great spending another year with you.’ I told her hey Maddie I'm typing the same thing right now! we are both so lucky to have each other in our lives. How sweet. So while I was sitting here waiting for the new years activities to begin, I just started hitting new mail messages in Outlook and typed quick happy new years messages to all my friends. Just to let them know I care about them and was thinking about them. it was so much fun. Every time a person popped in my mind I would type a quick message to them. Fun. Man if I ever had to make a choice, and I don't believe that we do, I would choose friends and family over anything else. I feel so blessed today reflecting on this.  

Also trying to stomach the Blue Mask. Been working on it now for a month or two after putting it down for some years. But who is he and why is he? He is a madman. He is a murderer. He is a prophet. He is a hero of sorts... but how? Still hard to understand and even harder to handle working on him for more than an hour... he is intense. He is voracious. He has no regret.  

Current Read: more of the same. Still studying the Islam faith and its history.  Had no idea that it was a spin off from Judaism/Christianity. Also reading little bits from the Tao Te ching as every year during this time. I think that it is the most holy of all books man has written so far. The most true and noble of all of our word collections. Most people just don't know it yet. Most people that live here on earth at this time still need God defined for them. They need all those rules and laws and pillars and sacraments and definitions and legends and myths that make up the major religions of today’s humanity. The Tao te ching offers very little of that. it defines God as we really know IT to be thus far, which is to say that we don't really know IT very well at all; but in our hearts we can feel IT---we get glimpses of IT. it is a bold testament to where we are and what we know. That is what makes it such an elusive and mysterious text to many, but at the same time, very sacred and holy and truthful to others. It is pure light without filters or mirrors. 

Current Spin: Zach Zischin new CD. Real as the memory. Lots of good songs on here. Power pop. Catchy as all hell. He is mixing the new Transcendence album. so hopefully some of that power pop polish will rub off on what we laid down. 

PS---had my final session of the year with my coach Gary. We always do this on the last day of the year. very special. We went over my list of goals/outcomes for the year of 2003 together. We both had copies. He is an Anthony Robbins coach so we use the Robbins RPM software to track goals. I had created 15 major goals last year on the 31^st of December 2002. what we noticed was that 2003 was a pretty crazy year. A lot of change and growth. More mental and emotional than purely physical things accomplished. We tracked the results pretty objectively. Noticed that I had achieved about half of the goals and outcomes I had listed one year prior. Seven out of 15. not bad. Mostly the ones that were more like I said mental or emotional, growth type goals, like the one about coming from my true heart, rather than doing what you think you're supposed to be doing, Also the one about not holding back power, rather than thinking or second guessing—just going for it all the time—being in the full on flow of your power. Both of those accomplished to the point where I couldn’t even relate to needing to have them written down now as goals anymore. Quit smoking. went to Italy to learn Italian and research my family. Made a lot more money. finished TTV. Finished and finally released the sleep with you album fifteen days before the year was over so that was cool. Figured out how to and completed the Diaries project. Etc. but other ones we just didn't even come close to. Def did not do any major tours which I really wanted to do. went on a few mini tours and they really just sucked. So that is something we really have to focus on. A few film and TV licensing deals. Things like that. So it was a chance at celebrating the accomplishments I did achieve and then recommitting and planning on how to achieve the ones I didn't yet reach. And then the fun part is to come up with all the new ones for the coming year. you transfer any of the old ones you still want and then add a bunch of new ones. I really like coaching. I think it’s a great way to stay focused. Having that outside source who is just there for you objectively to tell you like it is and help you achieve your dreams. most good coaches have coaches of their own too, to help them achieve their own goals. That's cool.