Still no apt. FEELING VERY FRUSTRATED. Still, I cannot explain how I feel here. so fresh and happy. 

The transcendence diaries have now reached 700 pages as of this entry.

Had a chance to see gw’s speech last night at the convention while we were protesting. He was brilliant. really good speaker. I am getting the feeling that bush is going to win. God help us all. but he is just on fire and he is a good speaker. He may not be presidential material, like John Kerry is, but he is a lot more charismatic than Kerry is. the thing about bush versus Kerry for the record, because we don't really know how this is going to turn out yet, is that even though bush is so much more pro-big corporation and Kerry is so much more pro-people, bush actually comes off more pro-people than Kerry does. And that's too bad, because if you study them you easily conclude how much more for the people Kerry and Edwards are. But bush just comes off a lot more for the people. a real regular-folk kind of guy.

Brilliant night tonight. got together with a bunch of friends. But they were all friends from different times and aspects of my life so none of them knew each other but were only bonded though being friends with me. and we all got along fabulously and had a great time hanging all over the city together.

Saw some more bush speech tonight where he was speaking to a crowd about something they call ‘conservative Values’ which from what I can tell loosely translates to ‘closed mindedness.’ When they find out someone is gay or bisexual, they think it's wrong; when I meet someone who is gay or bisexual I just think they're more open minded than I am.

When I see someone sleeping on the sidewalk, I think ‘man, I wonder what we can do to help those people.’ whereas when they see someone sleeping on the sidewalk, they think ‘man why don't they get a job and help themselves.’

I hear of some chick who is accidentally pregnant and I think ‘man I hope she finds a way to keep the baby. Maybe she can give it up for adoption if she doesn’t want it.’ they think ‘we need to pass a law to force that girl to keep that baby.’

I still can’t get over the fact that any of us are taking their whole ‘lets pass a constitutional amendment to ban same sex marriage’ trip seriously. its as bad as back in the slave days when they were trying to find ways to find technicalities to withhold equal rights from black people. just total primitives some of these people are still. we’re going to look back in the near future on these things and really be shocked by how tolerant we were of their backwoods ways. We are going to be studying these people and the whole mindset in college one day. I really believe that.

Its just a different way of looking at life.

There are fifteen thousand cabs and thirty thousand cab drivers in this tiny city.

I am so addicted to the city now. I don't want to leave. I have extended my trip another few days. I have to find a place to live like NOW. I cannot go back now. I don't even care if I ever see my stuff again. I could just stay here and sleep in a sleeping bag on a bare floor. Since the day I was born I was always a new Yorker who happened to be living in the wrong towns. Always felt like I was just visiting everywhere I lived so far in my short life. like I never fit in. this is the first place I've ever been where I felt like ‘I am home.’